Saturday, September 5, 2009

It's not all bad news after all!

I thought this week would be a disasterous weigh in, due to my naughtiness here and there, and the palava of last week! Buuuuut...


That's not bad you know! I lost almost a pound!! It's still a bit disappointing, but it's actually rather inspiring!

This entry is a bit short I'm afraid but we are trecking down to see my grandmother-in-law in the hospital. I'll update more in the week!

Keep the faith!

FS xx

Tuesday, September 1, 2009


This weekend we hosted a barbeque. I knew I wasn't going to be able to stick to my diet, so on Sunday I just relaxed and ate whatever took my fancy, without trying to analyze the nutritional content. It was luuuuuuush. But then yesterday there were leftovers, and I thought "oooh, it would be such a shame to just throw all that food away", so I ate it. This morning, I have yet to eat breakfast. It's 10am, and I'm starving. BUT I'm trying to figure out... am I going to eat diet friendly food, or something naughty? I don't think I have anything naughty left -- I asked my husband to throw away all the yummy bits that were left over last night. He did. THANK GOODNESS. Why can't I trust myself with delicious fooooods?

On the plus side, I have realised that writing this blogs does keep me accountable. Just sitting here typing has made me think of all the reasons why I need to stick at it. I need to do this. I'm 27 years old, and I really just want to be healthy, to walk the stairs at school and not feel breathless by the top, to wear the cute clothes that the models are wearing in the shop windows.

Okay. Off to make something healthy for breakfast! Yay! Thanks for setting me on the straight and narrow! I hope I can just keep at it...

Mwwwwaaaah xxx

Saturday, August 29, 2009


Guten Morgen!

Today was my weekly weigh in. This week I have felt like I've been starving myself. Yesterday I forgot to eat lunch, and by the evening my tummy was letting me know. That's why I was disappointed by this weeks weigh in...

299 lbs...

I mean WOOOO! I'm back in the 2XXs! Buuuuuuuuuuuut...

That's a total weight loss this week of just 2lbs. I know I should be thrilled. That's a good amount of weight to lose in one week, but the last two weeks I've been so impressed with my big losses, and this week feels like a lot less, you know?

Mind you, when I type it like THIS:

15lbs lost in FOUR WEEKS!

That looks better :)

I'm off to get my first milestone prize! My new electronic scales! So that's exciting! I need to go shooooooooping! Wooo!!!

I should be more cheerful than I am. Why am I not thrilled? I reached my first milestone this morning! YAY!!! (I'm trying to be ecstatic, I really am!) I suppose that in my head I've decided to lose weight, and I don't know why my body hasn't done it all. A month's a long time! That's what my heart is saying. Then there's my head, saying stupid annoying things like "it took you 27 years to put it on, it's not going to come off overnight". I KNOWWWW!!!! I just want it to!!!

Fingers crossed that I'll snap out of this attitude. It's this attitude that's lead to my downfall on diets in the past. I don't want that to happen this time.

I'll let you know how I go. Thanks for your support :)

FS xxx

Saturday, August 22, 2009

REALLY good morning!

Dearest Fatty Followers!!!

This morning was rather wonderful. I had 8 hours of really good uninterrupted sleep, after a stressful week, and what promises to be a stressful weekend, and woke up to the joy that is my neeeeew weight!

(drumrolllllll please!) 314 lbs original weight

- 2 lbs from the first week

- 6 lbs from the second week

- 5 lbs from the third week

= 301 lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm 13 lbs doooooown!!

How excited am I? VEEEEERY excited! Looks like next weekend my first prize is going to kick in, and I'll get that scale I've been dreaming about!!!

I was supposed to be flying to San Francisco this weekend, but with the current grandma-in-law situation I had to cancel. I am going to try to make it towards the end of the week. I'm scared about the plane seat factor though -- I booked first class tickets for the way there so that I had extra room, but the way back I could only get coach and was in the middle seat of a row of three. That was causing me a lot of anxiety, and I hope when I get to rebook I can get an aisle or window seat so I can wedge my butt in and throw myself against the unoccupied side. I always wonder if the person coming over to sit next to me takes a look at me and thinks "ooooh craaaaap"... I'm more than a little paranoid about that. But I really wanted to go to San Francisco, and if I can reschedule my flight I'll deal with the paranoia.

Over all though, I'm pretty excited. I've realised how dedicated I am to this diet, and I'm not doing anything to ruin it yet! Wow! That's a bit of a first to be honest!!! Once I get below 300, I'm never going back over it! So bring on the challenge of this week... 290s here I come!

Love and smooches,

FS xxx

Saturday, August 15, 2009

GOOD morning!

Wasssssup? I am clearly VERY excited this morning. I had my weigh in annnnnd

*Drum roll please*

306 lbs!!!!!!

I've dropped 6 lbs in a week!!! AWESOME!

I feel FANTASTIC! I can't believe it! I'm concerned that this weekend isn't going to be fabulous eating wise. My Grandmother-in-law (M) had a stroke yesterday and we are making the 4 hour journey down to see her, and will eat with the family wherever we go. I do not begrudge this at all (obviously) -- it's a really sad situation. Eating wise -- hmmm, I'm a comfort eater. Something tells me that next week's weight loss isn't going to be quite as significant, but I have hope. If there is one thing that M would want, it's for us all to be happy and healthy. Being a fatty doesn't fall in to either of those categories.

Sorry this is so brief, but we have to get going.

Bisous xxx

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Uh oh

This weekend was not fabulous. One week in and I did a naughty already! We had the family reunion, and Aunt-in-law made her famous cherry cheesecake... uh ohhh... boy, was it deeeelish! But I picked myself up and started again...

2lbs down! (current weight 312)

Weee! Although, frankly, I'd rather have lost a LOT more. A week in the life of a crappy dieter feels like an eternity, and feeling HUNGRY is a foreign, and as yet UNPLEASANT experience. I suppose I'll get used to it -- I suppose I have to, and HOPEFULLY that feeling will disappear as I just get used to eating less. Will it? WILL IT?! It had better... or else...

So I had an interview last week and forgot my suit. On the way down to the interview I had to buy a new suit, which I haven't had to do for a while... I did not like the numbers on the size tag! I normally buy tops and jeans with a little stretch to them... suits don't stretch. I've been kidding myself and buying tops in a 16/18 size, and jeans in my special "3 blue circle" or "4 red triangle" size, and a little weight fluctuation is okay, because they stretch with you. I am now convinced that spandex is the work of the Weight Gain Demon... You know, that little devil guy sitting on your shoulder, convincing you to have that slice of cherry cheesecake... Grrrrrr... "Just eeeeat it, your pants will still fit"... Well. That little dude has led to me having a size 24 bottom in a suit skirt, and a 22 top in the jacket. I HATE YOU, YOU DEMON!!!!!!! How do I get rid of him?!?!?!!!!

So, here I sit, in my stretchy black and white top (black is slimming, right?), and my crazy numbered jeans, typing away and feeling the burn (aka HUNGER). I'll keep at it, stick with me!!!

FS xx

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Blood work


Well, today I had my blood work done, and I'm not doing too badly for a big lady! My HDL is slightly low, but my normal cholesterol and glucose levels were optimal! Plus my blood pressure was awesome! 118/72! Wooo!

And, with it being only day three of the diet, I can officially say that I'm feeling pretty good! Yesterday was a HORRIBLE headache day -- getting rid of all that sugar is HARD!!!!! But then no one said it was going to be easy!!

I do need to step up the exercise though, that's not really happening yet, and we allll know that exercise PLUS diet is the key to weightloss!

See ya xx

P.S. On Sunday I weighed in at 314. Highest I've ever weighed... I have a plane seat to squeeze in to by the end of August, and I'm GOING TO GET BELOW 300 FOR IT!!!!!! (Or not, but I'm going to try that's for sure!!!)

Monday, August 3, 2009

Reward Scheme!


299lbs: Electronic scale
285lbs: Perfume
270lbs: Mani/Pedi
250lbs: Charm
230lbs: Necklace
210lbs: Theme park trip
190lbs: Clothing shopping spree

Day 2...


So, I've been on the diet for one full day. My head hurts A LOT!!!! I think it's clear that my usual love of sugary snacks is going to cause a problem -- I've cut out artificial sugar all together, so my body is VERY confused!.

I went to a wedding on Saturday night (one of the reasons behind starting my diet on Sunday) and ate SIX COURSES!! They were all delicious. It was also a great way to kick off my diet, because I woke up on Sunday feeling full (still), and the thought of more food made me want to puke. But, there is NO BAD FOOD in my house AT ALL. Ergo, should I feel the urge to cheat on my diet, I would have to go out to the shops. That's a lot of effort for snack food. Here's hoping the concept works!

The plan is not to tell anyone that I'm dieting. I'm hoping when I next see my parents (at Christmas) they will be amazed at my weight loss, and be super impressed. So really there are only three people who know. Except for anyone else reading this blog!

I took photos yesterday, so when the weight starts falling, I'll post some anonymous photos!

Right, I'm off to experience some hunger!

Toodles xx

Monday, July 27, 2009

Check in...

I'm no longer convinced that ridding my house of non-diet friendly food prior to diet commencement by EATING it was a good idea.

It sounded so sensible at the time. Save a trip to the grocery store, eat the naughty food already in the cupboards, munch on the emergency frozen pizza...

Throughout the course of the past year, I have accumulated rather a lot of naughties. And I am not prepared to throw them away, instead I devour them day by day, waiting for pay day, at which point I will go shopping and purchase only non-naughties. I PROMISE.

In advance of Diet Day (henceforth known as "D-Day") I have been figuring out an exercise plan. I have a lovely dog who would love nothing more than a little stint around the block. Also, I've managed to accumulate an (almost free) personal gym! A year and a half ago I bought an elliptical cross trainer machine, and since then I have acquired a treadmill, ski machine, resistance trainer, rowing machine, annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd a stationary bike. I'm going to be H.O.T.!!! AND I have a normal, every day, run of the mill, pedal-powered bike.

Oh, and by the way, D-Day is SUNDAY. THIS SUNDAY. Sure, many people would have started dieting the day they said "that's it". Suuuure, I work a little differently to most people, but I'm fairly sure that that's what makes me interesting. Suuuuuuuuuuuuure...

With 6 days left until D-Day, I'm starting to wonder about the logic of my plan... I think I'm going to have extra to lose. I suppose I will be able to let you know that on Sunday. That's the only day of the week that I'm allowing myself to weigh in.

I'm also finalising the details of my "reward scheme". I know what I want for the rewards, I'm trying to officially figure out what weight I want to get to, and how many "mini goals" there are going to be. Of course I'll let you know once it's official.

Anyway, have an awesome day, and in the immortal words of my best friend "In the immortal words of Arnie"... I'll be back.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Open letter to me.

Dear F.S.

In case you didn't notice. You're rather large.

Not just a little bit porky, actually. You're fat.

That trickery that The Fat Lady Store is pulling on you isn't any good. You are NOT a size 4. The little blue circle sitting next to that number four is your own personal asterisk. Size 4 *not really. Be honest. You're verging in to size 24 on the bottom. And go ahead, keep buying those size 16 tops, but who are you trying to fool? Your boobs and muffin top don't plan to be leashed for very long. Days of yanking your sweater down over the top of your jeans only to have to pull it up to keep your bazookas a little PG rather than R, are your own personal reminder of your previous indiscretions. Namely ice cream; chocolate; any form of potato; chinese take out; the list goes on...

You're fearful when you get on the Doctor's bed that it will collapse under you (it's okay, it can bear up to 500 lbs, I asked). You don't want to sit next to anyone on the plane because you're embarrassed that they might ask for the portion of the seat that they paid for, that you are occupying. You don't go to bars, because you are convinced people are talking about you. You don't get involved in sports, because you're quite certain that you'll do something stupid, and people will put it down to weight, rather than just simply bad coordination.

So, Miss Fatty Boom Boom, let's get on with it. Why are you fat? Because you don't have enough self discipline. Because you eat too much. It's no use blaming anyone or anything else. You're a big girl now (excuse the pun), and you need to do this on your own.

When you feel the need to eat something, ask yourself "why?"

It’s not good enough to eat something just because it tastes good. It’s not okay to eat something because you’re bored.

Just remember, the next time you think of snacking some chips, or indulging in a cake...

You want to wear a beautiful dress to some of the parties that you get invited to. You want to be stunning. You want to go and get your nails done and have your hair done up nicely, and know that in doing it you look STUNNING. Not just dolloping some fancy make up and hair do on a woman who just. doesn't. look. beautiful.

You want to go out to the bar without thinking that everyone is looking to you and laughing.

You want to go and get a massage. DESPERATELY. But you won’t. Because you don’t want a poor masseuse to have to run her hands through the rolls of your flab.

Why do you have to sit on the sidelines at volleyball? Be honest! It’s because you don’t want people to laugh at your weight flopping around. If a slim person falls over, it’s because they had an accident. If you fall over, it’s because you’re fat and uncoordinated.

You want to go to normal shops to buy clothes. Size 4 (blue dot) shouldn’t be the be all and end all for a lady’s fashion.

It’s not easy to get thin. It’s taken 27 years of your life to get this fat, don’t expect it to happen overnight. In fact, right now your immediate goal has to be this simple: Becoming able to make your chin touch your sternum... Wow. When did it get this bad?

So, current weight 311 lbs. Goal weight 180 lbs.

Things I want to do once I get down to 180:
Buy a nice pair of designer jeans
Go to a bar with your friends until LATE
Go to the 2 balls that you have available to you in the winter, AND buy a gorgeous dress, and get your hair and nails done for it.
Go to a theme park and not worry that your butt is going to hang over the edge, or you won't be able to get the safety bar down.
Go swimming. In public. In a bathing suit.

Good luck to you. Keep track of your progress.

I have faith in you!!